Gift Mode

Last week, I was watching and reading Miroslav Volf to find material about reconciliation that I could use for Sunday's sermon. In one of the articles, He mentioned Natalie Zemon Davis and her book, The Gift in 16th Century France. She says that people can operate in one of three modes: coercion mode, sales mode, or gift mode.

This intrigued me. So I did some research into gift theory.

This field was established in 1925 by Marcel Mauss. "Gifts are thought to be voluntary and altruistic, Mauss argues that they are obligatory and selfish" (Irven DeVore, Harvard Anthropologist). Gifts can even be used to manipulate and control others. Some economies appear to operate on the basis of obligatory gifts.

This raises the question of whether there can be such a thing as a true gift, a "free gift."

Jacques Derrida argues that four criteria must be met for there to be a "free gift":

• There is no reciprocity. The receiver of the gift does not return a gift to the giver.
  
• The recipient does not realize that he has received a gift. This way there can be no sense of debt caused by the gift.
  
• The giver must forget that he gave the gift. Otherwise, he would be able to benefit from the gift by thinking well of himself.
  
• The thing itself cannot appear as a "gift." As soon as the thing given is seen as a boon, it imposes a sense of obligation.

Clearly, Derrida believes that a real gift is impossible. Others (Russell Belk) have suggested more realistic criteria for true gifts:

• The gift must involve sacrifice by the giver. The giver gives of himself. A gift that cost nothing is not a true gift. King David said, "I will not sacrifice burnt offerings to the Lord my God that cost me nothing" (2 Samuel 24:24). This is behind the moral discomfort of "re-gifting."
  
• The gift must be given for the pleasure of the receiver. If the "gift" is given for some selfish purpose, it is not a gift. Husbands should take note, giving your wife something that you want is worse than no gift at all.
  
• The gift must not be a basic necessity. While a box of chocolates would make a suitable gift for most people, a bag of potatoes would be inappropriate. Another mistake husbands often make.
  
• The gift must be uniquely appropriate to the person. This is why giving money seems so "cold."
  
• The perfect gift surprises and delights the recipient. If the gift is expected, it ceases to be a gift.

Marshall Sahlins said rather cynically, "If friends make gifts, gifts make friends" (page 10)

Sometimes when people appear to be giving a gift, they are really operating in manipulation mode or transaction mode. A true gift is free of any obligation. But it is not just the giving end where there can be a problem.

The recipient of a gift can turn a true gift into a "transaction."

For most people, religion is a combination of transaction mode and manipulation mode.

In some forms of religion the worshipper uses the rites and ceremonies to manipulate the diety. Christians sometimes fall into this error. They think that if they are good that God owes them a good life. They try to put God into their debt.

Others have a higher view of the process. They don't stoop to manipulating God. They simply expect "what is fair." For them religion operates according to quid pro quo.

Now most Christians "know" that grace is the "unmerited favor of God." They "know" that salvation is a gift. They "know" that nothing can be done to earn God's love.

Problem is, they don't live that way.

Pastor Rod

"Helping you become the person God created you to be"

Prodigal Grace

Here’s another quotation from Free of Charge by Miroslav Volf:

God’s forgiveness is indiscriminate. That’s the bedrock conviction of the Christian faith. “One has died for all,” wrote the apostle Paul (2 Corinthians 5:14). That simple claim has immense implications. All means all, without exception. There are no people who are sufficiently good so that God doesn’t need to forgive them and Christ didn’t die for them. There are no people who are too wicked for God to forgive them and for Christ to die for them. And there are no people whom God, for some inscrutable reason, decided not to forgive.
Miroslav Volf, Free of Charge, pp. 177–178

Pastor Rod

“Helping you become the person God created you to be”

Free of Charge

When I read a book, I highlight passages that I want to keep in my collection of quotations. I nearly used up my yellow marker on Miroslav Volf's book, Free of Charge: Giving and forgiving in a culture stripped of grace.

I like some books because they make me think about deep theological issues. They challenge my assumptions and force me to look at reality in a fresh way. Other books have more practical value. They deal with the details of life. They make me look at myself in the light of God's truth.

Volf's book succeeds on both levels.

I can't possibly include all the quotes I'd like. (For one thing, the publisher would consider that a violation of the copyright law.) But here are just a few profound thoughts from this work:

No life worth living is possible without generosity.

If we see the God of Jesus Christ as a negotiator, we'll experience the law of Christ as an even heavier burden than the law of Moses.

On the cross, God is not setting up the terms of a contract that humans need to fulfill in order to get what they want. Neither is God saying, "I died for you, now you've got to do what I tell you."

To live well as a human being is to live in sync with who God is and how God acts.

God isn't wrathful in spite of being love. God is wrathful because God is love.

The world is sinful. That's why God doesn't affirm it indiscriminately. God loves the world. That's why God doesn't punish it in justice. What does God do in this double bind? God forgives.

God doesn't make deals. God gives.

Volf reaffirms some of the things I've thought or felt but never articulated clearly. But he also challenges me in several points.

Out of context, some of these quotations seem to repeat familiar Christian "talking points." But this is a book free of cliche. And Volf expresses familiar truths in way that makes them seem like new discoveries.

Buy the book--and some highlighters.

Pastor Rod

"Helping You Become the Person God Created You to Be."